If we’re empty nesters it means that our children are grown. No, they haven’t stopped growing (neither have we!) but they are now physically removed from us. We don’t have day to day contact. We don’t know the details of what is going on in their life.

We don’t know if they are sad, in trouble, making wise decisions or foolish ones. For us there’s a profound sense of loss. We miss them. We miss “the knowing” about the tiny details of their life. In the “not knowing,” we can also experience a heightened sense of fear, especially if we have a vivid imagination. Some of us will be inclined to assume the worst. Others will assume no news is good news.             

It’s an awkward transition for us and for them. We used to know and now we don’t. But this transition can also be good for us.  It forces us to remember who is really in control. As a parent we did practice control while raising our kids, but the reality is that although we may have felt we were in control, we never really were. God was all along and He hasn’t stopped. He knows every detail of their life today. He knows their rough edges and their challenges. He knows the plans He has for them. And He loves them even more than we do.

One of the lessons for me in the empty nest has been learning to trust God’s control in my children’s lives in a deeper way. And it’s made me realize how small my faith has been because it was easier to rely on myself while they were under my roof.  So God has many lessons for me personally in this new season. I want to grow in my confidence that He is in control in my children’s lives. And this means that I need to grow in getting to know Him better myself. I need to spend more time in His word, on my knees in prayer, learning from other believers, reading thoughtful books, stepping out in new ministry adventures.   As I go deeper in knowing who He is, I am better able to relinquish my children to Him because I trust Him more and I’m reassured that He is at work in my children’s lives.

Psalm 121 is a beautiful reminder that our God is a “watching over you” God. At this very moment He is watching over our children. He is in control.